Let’s say you live in Oklahoma. Let’s say you are on your front lawn and with your 3 year old son who is not yet completely potty trained. Let’s say your 3 year old, un-potty trained kid has to pee and let’s say a police officer happens to drive by. What do you think would happen? If you guessed that the cop would fine the mother $2,500 for public urination you are right! What did you learn from this? Don’t live in Oklahoma.
Tag Archives: Cry
Courtney Stodden: Erin Brockovich of today?
2 NovNO.
Welp, that is what Courtney proclaimed in the most recent episode of VH1’s “Couples Therapy” on Wednesday night.
Before I get into why her diluted mind thinks that, let’s review Erin Brockovich for a second. In short, Erin Brockovich was working as law clerk who was instrumental in facilitating the case against PG&E. She did all that while raising her children and without a formal law education. She is now an environmental activist and consultant. With that being said, the only take away Courtney took from this incredible true life depiction was the cleavage Julia Roberts showed in her award winning role in the onscreen adaptation. Maybe her ears don’t work due to a blockage of loose saline from her chest? No, no, those are “rill.”
In the last few episodes of VH1’s “Couples Therapy” Courtney Stodden was reprimanded several times for her barely there clothing choices and when confronted by Dr. Jenn she profusely states that she has “saved many lives” because she is who she is and dresses in a way that expresses who she is…(a slut – sorry)…blah blah blah. Yes, that comment has shocked us all. I think this ding dong is attempting to say that her dressing with pasties, a fig leaf and five inch lucite heels is expressing who she is and is somehow trying to combat bullying while being pro individuality? Anyway, it took some convincing but Dr. Jenn was able to get Courtney to go shopping with her so she can dress in real people clothes. You know, clothes that aren’t purchased from foreplay.com. Courtney came back to the house in white jeans and a tight fitting top. She was not thrilled and she called it her uniform. (Why doesn’t this girl realize that since she is still wearing 5 inch lucite heels and has huge melons she is going to look sexy in a poncho). She looked more normal, not totally normal but like a Christian girl from the suburbs with daddy issues type normal.
Courtney wore her new outfit for one whole day and it seemed as thought she was making progress keeping her clothes on. Then the next day came. Courtney shows up to the house in a bikini top and something that can only be described as a doll clothing size tennis skirt, for a sluttly doll. This forces Dr. Jenn to confront her yet again. She asks Courtney to change and come back to the house so therapy can continue. Courtney says something like she is not going to change for anyone. Dr. Jenn clarifies that she just needs to change her clothes and come back. Courtney continues to spew more crap out of her mouth like, she won’t change because she is a strong woman and everyone is a bully…yadda, yadda, yadda. Then she says it, “I guess you could call me the 21st century Erin Brockovich. That’s me.”
That is the greatest thing she has ever said next to her last gem, “I have saved many lives”
WTF?
Courtney, you cannot compare yourself to Erin Brockovich. Other than the fact that you both have a face you have nothing in common with her. Erin Brockovich actually DID SAVE LIVES.
OMG! Staples is having a sale on BINDERS FULL OF WOMEN!
17 Oct
OMG! Staples is having a sale on BINDERS FULL OF WOMEN!
Get to your neighborhood office supply store ASAP so you can get your mitts on the best binders full of women!! Damn, I NEED a new Trapper Keeper!
How much of a dickhead is this guy? Mitt is not very smart, so he obviously did not realize the phrase “binders full of women” is absolutely ridiculous. I wonder how many different “binders” 
he has. Does he have volumes like the Encyclopedia Britanica? Does he have binders full of men? Has he ever heard of a COMPUTER or an electrionic file? This man is not only throwing females back into the 1950’s but he is actually filling up binders with large amounts of paper?!
How brain dead do you have to be to think that this is the person you want running your country? This man in a complete cocktard.
Check out this delightful site: “Binders Full of Women“
OMG! Staples is having a sale on BINDERS FULL OF WOMEN!
17 OctOMG! Staples is having a sale on BINDERS FULL OF WOMEN!
Get to your neighborhood office supply store ASAP so you can get your mitts on the best binders full of women!! Damn, I NEED a new Trapper Keeper!
How much of a dickhead is this guy? Mitt is not very smart, so he obviously did not realize the phrase “binders full of women” is absolutely ridiculous. I wonder how many different “binders” he has. Does he have volumes like the Encyclopedia Britanica? Does he have binders full of men? Has he ever heard of a COMPUTER or an electrionic file? This man is not only throwing females back into the 1950’s but he is actually filling up binders with large amounts of paper?!
How brain dead do you have to be to think that this is the person you want running your country? This man in a complete cocktard.
Check out this delightful site: “Binders Full of Women“
Is @BravoTV serious with this show #LOLwork
10 OctIs @BravoTV serious with this show #LOLwork?? Looks like a fake work. http://ow.ly/en8Yj
11 reasons why age 23 is too young to be a professional Wedding Planner/Coordinator
7 AugDoogie Howser proved everyone wrong. He proved to be a fantastic, 16 year old genius Doctor. I understand that he was fictional but he was a damn genius. Not everyone is as suited as Doogie was for a particular role at a young age.
Let’s take a Wedding Planner/Coordinator for example. If you are right out of College at the young age of 23 you should probably not be number one in charge for a wedding. Let’s list some reason why:
1. Only wedding they have attended was an older siblings.
2. They confuse Peonies with Panini’s. If this happens, get the hell out of there. No one is holding a bouquet of sandwiches.
3. She will tell you how nervous she is about her job.
4. SHE IS 23!
5. The last party she was at included grain alcohol, keg stands & funnels (and projectile vomiting).
6. SHE IS 23!
7. In the past 5 years she has been to more proms and formals than weddings.
8. SHE IS 23!
9. When talking about flowers she recalls all the carnations she received from her Valentine’s Day secret admirer in high school. FIVE YEARS AGO!
10. She talks about her sorority non-stop.
11. SHE IS 23!
I could go on but I don’t think I have to.
When cupcakes become land mines…
1 JunJust when you think the smoke has finally cleared from your wedding wars, you detonate another landmine. Who thought a cupcake would be landmine. Cupcakes are not meant to start arguments. Cupcakes are sweet, decadent treats that make people smile. That holds true 99% of the time – when they are not wedding cupcakes.
It’s true, wedding planning is more stressful than an audit. For example, talking about cupcakes in the first month or two of the engagement is easy and breezy. She says, “Oh lets do cupcakes!” He says, “Sure, sounds great.” (Insert hugs, kisses & smiles here) Blah blah blah. Then just months before the wedding when you actually need to finalize things with the baker your hugs, kisses & smiles turn into “You want THAT color?” “You want THAT frosting?” “I think it is going to look dumb that way.” “Well, screw the cupcakes let’s just tell all the guests that they don’t get dessert because you didn’t like the design. I’ll be drunk anyway.” – Enough!
I nearly lost my shit when I realized we were arguing (half laughing because of the ridiculousness) over our once favorite, sweet, must smile while eating, delicious treat.
Here is an idea to help prevent your cake or cupcakes from looking like this:
You can try to go old school and make a collage (I am 100% aware of how cheesy this sounds) to give the other person a visual. This way you are both somewhat on the same page. You both can add to it and try to put together all the pieces of your perfect cake or cupcake tier. Plus, that will really help your baker understand your vision and provide you exactly what you are looking for.
Now your cake or cupcakes will look more like this: 
Happy planning…
-LB
Title should be, “12 Resons why I will be single forever.” Real title, “Twelve tips for singles at weddings” – The Washington Post
31 MayI think this woman really has to be joking with some of this. Let’s start with Tip 11: Play with the kids. She thinks it will make you look attractive to others I think it might be creepy to the parents (since you’re a stranger). Then there is my personal fav, Tip 12: Get yourself adopted. – WTF is that? Her advise is to have another couple adopt you for the night. It sounds like she is advising a threesome. This whole thing is weird.
I say if you are single at a wedding, just be normal. That’s all.
Title should be, “12 Resons why I will be single forever.” Real title, “Twelve tips for singles at weddings” – The Washington Post
31 MayI think this woman really has to be joking with some of this. Let’s start with Tip 11: Play with the kids. She thinks it will make you look attractive to others I think it might be creepy to the parents (since you’re a stranger). Then there is my personal fav, Tip 12: Get yourself adopted. – WTF is that? Her advise is to have another couple adopt you for the night. It sounds like she is advising a threesome. This whole thing is weird.
I say if you are single at a wedding, just be normal. That’s all.
A Little Burdi Told Me 